ADHD burnout: My experience of burnout, recovery and what I learned.
Burnout is often talked about as though it happens overnight.
One day you’re fine and the next you’re completely broken.
That wasn’t my experience.
In early 2023, I burnt out so badly that I was signed off work for several months.
At the time, I didn’t know that’s what it was.
I just knew I couldn’t seem to function in the way I normally could. I felt completely overwhelmed, couldn’t stop crying and found even the simplest tasks difficult. Some days, taking my children to school felt like climbing a mountain.
Looking back now, I can see the signs were there long before I reached breaking point.
The problem is that they didn’t look like warning signs at the time.
They looked like being a good leader.
Burnout didn’t happen overnight
People often ask me what caused my burnout.
The honest answer is that there wasn’t one thing.
Looking back, it was a perfect storm of factors that had been building over time:
- Working longer hours because there was always more to do.
- Taking responsibility for things that weren’t mine to own.
- Putting other people’s needs ahead of my own.
- Telling myself I’d rest once this project was finished or things had calmed down a bit.
- Navigating life with undiagnosed ADHD.
- Working in an environment that wasn’t always a good fit.
What feels obvious now wasn’t obvious then.
I cared deeply about my work and the people around me. I wanted to be helpful. I wanted to be seen as capable and reliable. If something needed doing, I’d often step in. If someone needed support, I’d try to help.
The trouble is that when you’re wired that way, it’s very easy to keep moving the goalposts.
You tell yourself you’ll slow down after this project.
You’ll prioritise yourself next month.
Then next month becomes six months later.
The signs I missed before burnout
One of the reasons I think burnout can be difficult to spot is that many of the signs can look surprisingly positive from the outside.
People see dedication. They see resilience. What they don’t see is the cost.
Looking back, some of the signs were:
- Feeling constantly tired, even after resting.
- Struggling to switch off from work.
- Carrying a constant sense of pressure and urgency.
- Feeling responsible for everything.
- Becoming increasingly emotional and overwhelmed.
- Believing I just needed to push through a little longer.
The problem was that I kept assuming things would be fine eventually.
The conversation that tipped me over the edge
There was one particular conversation that finally pushed me past my limit.
I had a difficult and fairly confrontational discussion with a senior leader.
Looking back, the conversation itself wasn’t really the issue. It simply landed at a time when I was already running on empty.
At the time, I didn’t know I had ADHD and I’d never heard of rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD). I couldn’t have explained why the conversation affected me so deeply.
I just remember feeling crushed by it.
It wasn’t the cause of my burnout, but it was the straw that broke the camel’s back.
The cumulative impact of everything that had come before it finally caught up with me.
I didn’t know it was burnout
What strikes me now is that I didn’t recognise burnout while I was living through it.
I knew something wasn’t right, so I went to my GP. I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression and prescribed medication.
For some people, medication can be incredibly helpful. But for me, it made things significantly worse. I’d gone from having lots of feelings to having none at all. I just felt numb.
Now, with the benefit of hindsight, I can see I was exhausted. Mentally, emotionally and physically.
My body and brain had reached a point where they simply couldn’t keep going at the pace I’d been asking them to.
ADHD and burnout
Since being diagnosed with ADHD, I’ve realised that some ADHD traits, alongside masking, made me more vulnerable to burnout.
- The rumination
- My executive functioning challenges
- My people pleasing
It wasn’t the cause of my burnout, but it was one piece of a much bigger picture.
Burnout is rarely caused by one thing. In my experience, it was the result of personal, organisational and environmental factors building over time.
Recovering from burnout: what helped me
Being signed off work forced me to do something I’d spent years avoiding.
Stop.
And if I’m honest, that was bloody hard and felt so uncomfortable.
I’ve always been someone who likes to be useful and who takes pride in showing up and getting things done.
But somewhere in the middle of all that discomfort, I realised I couldn’t keep living in the same way and expect a different outcome. Something had to change.
One of the best things I did was ask for help.
I invested in ADHD coaching because I knew there were patterns I needed to understand and unpick.
Around the same time, I listened to Dr Julie Smith’s audiobook, Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?
I can still picture myself listening to it while gardening.
There wasn’t a single breakthrough moment. Instead, there were lots of small moments where things started to make sense.
And slowly, I began rebuilding.
Through that process, I learned that:
- Emotions aren’t the enemy; they’re often trying to tell us something.
- Thoughts aren’t facts, particularly when we’re overwhelmed.
- Self-talk matters.
- Asking for help is a strength, not a weakness.
- No productivity hack can fix what rest, support and self-compassion are meant to heal.
These days, I still have moments where I notice old patterns creeping back in.
The difference is that I spot them sooner. I notice when my energy is running low and do something about it.
And I’ve learned that rest isn’t something I have to earn.
Looking back
Looking back, there are things I’d do differently.
I’d ask for help sooner.
I’d pay more attention to my energy.
I’d stop treating rest as something that has to be earned.
But I also have more compassion for the version of me who couldn’t see what was happening.
What feels obvious now wasn’t obvious then.
If this story feels familiar, please don’t wait for breaking point before listening to yourself.
The quieter signals matter too.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, stuck in cycles of people pleasing or worried you’re heading towards burnout, you’re not alone. ADHD coaching can help you understand what’s happening, build practical strategies that work for your brain and create a more sustainable way of living and working.
Book a free, no-pressure discovery call to find out more.